We have all heard it when we are struggling with an issue. Well meaning and the not so well meaning people will tell you that “It is always darkest before the dawn”–it rolls off their tongue without thought, and almost as if they are privy to some secret knowledge of your future. The phrase comes across as trite; and after dealing with so many years of dark and painful days, I had grown weary of that phrase. You could say I have held a resentment to those seven words!
However, through the suffering, through my anger, through the seemingly thoughtless comments of others, I have found an abundance of miracles and purging of those unneeded items in my spiritual garage.
Do I really need to worry about issues that are beyond my control, or leave them neatly packaged in a Ziploc bag?
Should I keep those regrets or put them out on a table to get rid of?
What about my emotional pain? Do I really need that or can I give it away?
Can my anger be used for something positive? If not, shall I box that up as well?
Looking around my heart, I find so many things that need a spring cleaning and should be boxed and labeled with unworn clothing, unused our outdated household goods and put out for sale. However, those intangible items are such that I wouldn’t want to sell them or give them away. There is one customer, however, who is willing to take everything and requires no hauling charges.
Jesus, who so freely gave His life for my sinfulness is ready to take it all–every box, every bag, every encumbrance and remove it from my life. All I have to do is ask.
If I am tempted to hold on to these items in fear that I will be nothing without them, all I have to do is look outside.
The verdant carpet of green after a spring rain, the butterflies flitting on the emerging daffodils that come up without any assistance from me, a sweet kiss from my dog in the morning, birds chirping in our feeders, and friends who call unexpectedly to see how we are doing are all signs of light.
Light abounds–there is no darkness. We may feel dark, but if we carry the light of Jesus within us, no darkness can overcome us. It is His light that offers my freedom, and increases my sense of gratitude for each new day.
My perspective is slowly changing and perhaps that is part of God’s overall plan for us with this period of desert and suffering. Perhaps I wasn’t appreciative enough. Perhaps I took God’s gracious bounty for granted. Perhaps I failed to thank Him for His most intimate love and care.
Through losing nearly everything, I have realized just how rich and blessed we are-we have everything! We have our Faith, enough food to eat, we have heat and electricity, our marriage has not only survived through this crisis, but thrived, and we have learned who our friends truly are.
I am learning day by day to be grateful for a new dawn, for my husband waking up next to me, for the aroma of fresh coffee, for the warmth of the sun, the giggles of my grandchildren, and the Light that is thrusting out the darkness!